BreakingSenate Reaches Bipartisan Agreement That AI 'Probably Knows How To Vote But Definitely Shouldn't' DebunkedOpenAI's Latest Pivot Is The Most Exciting Pivot Yet, Says Company With No Remaining Founders ReportedContinental Europe Once Again Bested By Argentine Beef, Reports Our Man In The Drawing Room Allegedlytiktok is back babes the meltdown was so brat BreakingSenate Reaches Bipartisan Agreement That AI 'Probably Knows How To Vote But Definitely Shouldn't' DebunkedOpenAI's Latest Pivot Is The Most Exciting Pivot Yet, Says Company With No Remaining Founders ReportedContinental Europe Once Again Bested By Argentine Beef, Reports Our Man In The Drawing Room Allegedlytiktok is back babes the meltdown was so brat
May 5, 2026

Greta Thundergust

Climate correspondent. Has predicted the apocalypse correctly so many times she is now openly bored by it. Reports temperature records the way other people read off football scores. Drinks oat milk on camera. Carries a thermometer. (FICTIONAL CHARACTER — The Crayon Press is a satire publication.)

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